In Between

Congratulations, Raymond and Maichi! She is first one in our family to take that wonderful step towards eternal unification.

Symbollically (vs. technically), marriage has always been a goal for me. Given good timing and readiness, to find that person that you declare as your life partner is beautiful thing. I always thought that as soon as you know it, you know it. But I have also learned that it is not easy, and it doesn't necessarily come naturally nor clearly. While it is brave to believe in that kind of effortless love, I find it brave to also admit that it takes a lot more work than you might be ready for. I don't know the answers, but in my experience there will be pivotal points where one feels to quit. But when you shake off the fears and open the doors, the belief in love is restored and then the two can continue forth even stronger and happier than before. When you find that person, hang on for the ride.

So here's to the journey, Maichi and Raymond! I hope that you two are excited for the many adventures you have in store together.

I have to admit, I've always opted to buy gifts over making gifts for people; but when I stumbled upon these soft trees on littlebirds by stephanie congdon barnes, the martha stewart in me started kicking. I invited my collaboration partner Krystle Cho to spend an evening of crafts with me and it was really nice to use my hands and chat with a good friend.

Joined through a photo blogging project 3191, stephanie of littlebirds is also associated with mav of port2port press, whose work inspired me to meet with my good friend and designer colleague, Debbie Kim, and design x-mas cards for our friends & family. We chose wood-block printing as our medium and had tons-o'-fun picking out paper and ink at Blick Art Materials in Berkeley. It's pretty much a haven for alls yous artists. Plus the staff is super helpful and knowledgable.

Pics of both nights of crafts below. Happy holidays to all who happen to view this; comment and let me know you were here!

I'm feeling pretty fantastic today. It's been a while since I've been happy with all aspects of my life: Friends, Family, Work, Love, Creativity. Physical Health is not on that list because it's on timeout - always too disappointing.

I slept in this Saturday morning. I awoke to find amazing sunlight bursting through my blinds, so I let it in and my room has been glowing since. I've lit candles, eaten boiled eggs and wheat English muffins, played with the camera, organized the piles in my room into new piles, cleaned the kitchen and bathroom, done sufficient web browsing and even wrote an entry for the collaborative journal. More on that when time comes.

Creativity is flowing through me and it feels so gooood. I am enjoying it thoroughly while it lasts. You know that feeling, when you have something you know is good but only temporarily? The ONLY thing you can do is appreciate it and take advantage of all that it offers, while it's being offered. Don't think about anything but the present, and don't be sad when when the moment is gone.

I'm going to go eat some ice cream now.

I love all things tender and simple like this. It makes me want.
I'm definitely going to check out their wedding sets, if time comes.

A huge huge redesign. My first big user interface design project and I found myself really enjoying the brain aches of trying to organize the information in the most friendly, intuitive, efficient and sensible order. Comprised of over 11 main pages, the engineering team did a fantastic (and difficult) job of following the mockups and making it happen.

Stats show a significant increase in photos channel views, ratings and comments overall, especially on ArtBistro's portfolios. Take a look!

Hi all! Yes, I'm alive. Yes, I've been working. Here's a few recent showable designs that I've done here at Affinity Labs / Monster Worldwide. Other things are user interface design like forms and such that are hard work but not as visually interesting to the fresh eye. =)



Quick flyer for my friend at Beachside Recycling down in LA.
Distribution 10,000 manu
facturing businesses in Orange County.


















AdminSecret.com
A social networking site for administrative professionals.
Color scheme and logo design.









WomenCo.com
A social networking site for women professionals.
Color scheme and logo redesign. The previous skin was mainly black with pink highlights and felt too 'stripperish' for professionals.







LEDegrees.com
Law Enforcement Education landing page.
Logo and skin design.




Otherwise, I'm finally comfortable working here in San Francisco and living in Emeryville - it's been six months since I made The Big Move mid-March. Most of the time I'm here at the office (and occasionally happy hour!) with my awesome co-workers. On the weekends I'm either visiting my parents in Davis, doing weekendy things with Jason, or going on a mini trip to the beach or camping or tahoe or something... I've been looking at cars lately (! Milan? A CAR!?) and hopefully will start shopping this month.

On an inner level I've been very careful about adjusting, almost to the point of being on guard all the time. I'm tired. My new mantra is "be open and others will open to you".

More to come, I hope!

Sketches for an Affinity Labs t-shirt. The theme is "the science of community", each particle/molecule/electron representing one of our community sites.

www.PoliceLink.com
www.TheApple.com
www.FireLink.com
www.NursingLink.com
www.ArtBistro.com
www.InsideTech.com
www.GovCentral.com
www.IndiaOn.com
www.WomenCo.com
www.AllHealthcare.com
www.SalesHQ.com
www.HRGuru.com
www.AdminSecret.com

"When you live in tension, that is the best possible atmosphere for high creativity. Thats where the void is and that's where God is: in between. We need a two-eyed view. Otherwise there will be no charge, no electricity; there will be no joy."

- Father William McNamara

One day, Hannah and I mapped out our route to different houses and apartments we found on Craigslist. We drove all over Bay Area and the last apartment (which was supposed to be our first stop) turned out to be the one we loved. We applied for the apartment that same night. The next day, which was a Wednesday, we get approved, and life starts chugging into motion.

A week flies by, during which I am mentally trying to prepare for this move, while applying for jobs like mad, because how the hell am I going to pay rent. With the magic of networking, the universe hands me an interview at Affinity Labs. I'm scheduled for the interview on Thursday, which looked like this: meet a potential third roommate in the morning, sign the lease at noon, go to the interview in the afternoon, walk in heels until my feet cry, move things into my apartment at night, and finally yes finally stop to breathe. I'm laying beside Jason on my makeshift bed on the floor that first night, breathing, and all I can do is ask myself: How do I spend nearly a quarter of my life waiting for this moment, have it all happen within a week, and respond?

Another week passes and three monumental things have happened.
1) I actually DROVE back, thanks to the help of my big sister, Maichi
2) Semar has agreed to live with Hannah and I, and they both move in on Sunday
3) I begin my designer contractor position come Monday (!)

Again, breathe.

I'd been unemployed for two months, worrying and wondering when things would look up, and now I am stunned, like a child who lost Mommy for the first time. Looking forward into the unknown, I realize I am leaving behind a life of everything I've ever known. My family, my dear friends, downtown, the greenbelt, bicycles, Farmer's Market... I have twenty minutes to spare so I drive to the nearest park, the ToiletBowl, where I ran into a bee that vengefully stung my shin, where my sisters and Hannah and I would play House, in the pine needles, where Mica and I would roller blade on the tennis court, against all park rules. I sit on a slope and watch a ladybug crawl onto my journal, kids coming home from school, one falling off her bike. Still reminiscing those memories is a gift will stay with me as I go on. It won't be the same, but thank God for that, because then, it is special.

I should also remember to look forward with that same tenderness with which I look back. New adventures and new memories are to be made. Today, on my little sisters's 21st (Happy Birthday Meeks), Jas helped me shop for apartment essentials, like soap and bathtowels. We had a good, fun, lazy, light day full of laughing over good meals and subsequent food coma, driving through green hills and beneath massive clouds, taking forbidden naps and snacking on candy. The other week, Debbie, Karen, Evan, Jas and I discovered a bar called Kitty's where we stood and sipped and enjoyed the walk to and from. I am still transitioning into this new place, and while I wish that I could bring everything and everyone I love about Davis here to Emeryville, I know I will be okay.

Please keep in touch. milan.phan@gmail.com